It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere. - Agnes Repplier

Coffee makes me happy. Yep, simple as that. It's a beautiful moment. . .

. . . curled up on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, reading a great novel and the kitten purring on your chest as the sunlight beams through the apartment window with the view of New York skylines, sipping fresh french pressed coffee.

. . . sitting in a crowded cafe on the corner of a West Village treelined street, people watching with my notebook and laptop computer propped open awaiting to be painted with letters, slowly savoring a dark espresso, beginning with the light layer of foam.

. . . walking in to the coffee shop on a groggy Monday morning with New York Times in hand and am picked up by a strong coffee with a dash of soymilk and cinnamon.

Mmmm. . .the aroma, warmth and caffeine kick is blended to perfection to create pure (caffeinated) happiness.

bogota, colombia

Espresso-chocolate shortbread cookies (Adapted from Baking: From My Home to Yours - Dorie Greenspan):

1 tablespoon instant espresso powder
1 tablespoon boiling water
2 sticks (8 ounces) unsalted butter, at room temperature
2/3 cup confectioners’ sugar
1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
4 ounces bittersweet chocolate (plain, or a toffee variety), finely chopped, or 3/4 cup store-bought mini chocolate chips
Confectioners’ sugar, for dusting (optional)

Dissolve the espresso in the boiling water, and set aside to cool to tepid.
Beat the butter and confectioners’ sugar together on medium speed for about 3 minutes, until the mixture is very smooth.
Beat in the vanilla and espresso, then reduce the mixer speed to low and add the flour, mixing only until it disappears into the dough. Don’t work the dough much once the flour is incorporated.
Fold in the chopped chocolate with a sturdy rubber spatula.
Using the spatula, transfer the soft, sticky dough to a gallon-size zipper-lock plastic bag. Put the bag on a flat surface, leaving the top open, and roll the dough into a 9 x 10 1/2 inch rectangle that’s 1/4 inch thick. As you roll, turn the bag occasionally and lift the plastic from the dough so it doesn’t cause creases. When you get the right size and thickness, seal the bag, pressing out as much air as possible, and refrigerate the dough for at least 2 hours, or for up to 2 days.
Position the racks to divide the oven into thirds and preheat the oven to 325 degrees F. Line two baking sheets with parchment or silicone mats.
Put the plastic bag on a cutting board and slit it open. Turn the firm dough out onto the board (discard the bag) and, using a ruler as a guide and a sharp knife, cut the dough into 1 1/2-inch squares. Transfer the squares to the baking sheets and carefully prick each one twice with a fork, gently pushing the tines through the cookies until they hit the sheet.
Bake for 18 to 20 minutes, rotating the sheets from top to bottom and front to back at the midway point. The shortbreads will be very pale–they shouldn’t take on much color. Transfer the cookies to a rack.
If you’d like, dust the cookies with confectioners’ sugar while they are still hot. Cool the cookies to room temperature before serving.

“There is no quality in this world that is not what it is merely by contrast. Nothing exists in itself.” - Herman Melville

It's amazing the numerous variations one can come up with around one main ingredient or food and then build a whole restaurant menu on that base. Years ago, way before moving to New York, I heard about Rice to Riches, rice pudding in over twenty flavors like sex drugs and rocky road (no idea what that is) and old fashioned romance (traditional) and about ten different possible toppings like oatmeal coconut crumble or buttery graham cracker blanket. Peanut Butter & Co. is a store in the West Village dedicated to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. It brings you back to the good ol' days of childhood with a sophisticated twist if you so choose to prentend to be mature. There's The Elvis that is a grilled peanut butter sandwich stuffed with bananas and honey and can even be tried with bacon if you so daringly choose (gross) or The Fluffernutter, freshly ground peanut butter sandwiched with a glob of heavenly marshmallow fluff (hopefully you haven't been deprived as a child and know what this is). The shop that originated in 1998 also offers flavored peanut butter - spicey, white chocolate, cinammon-raisin or chocolate peanut butter.

Over the weekend I tried a savory version of this trend. Mussels - 23 varieties of mussels are offered to customers at Flex Mussels in the Upper East Side. Upon walking in, it looks like a small bar with what I think could be seats for those that don't make reservations because it got really busy starting around 7P. But, walking past the hostess in to a larger room that could seem cold and bare with wooden tables and floors you're greeted by warm aromas of garlic and butter that turns the place to an inviting ambience. The walls are covered in beautifully framed travel photography that bring me back to the days of travel essays and anthropology, inspiring me to add getting back in to photography to my list of new years resolutions.

The pound of mussles are carried out to the table in huge silver pots and lids removed at the table to expose the steamy aroma. While I was tempted to try the Provencal (tomato, basil, saffron, orange zest, pernod, garlic, white wine), South Pacific (kaffir lime leaf, cilantro, white wine, lemongrass), or the Italiano (calamari, roasted garlic, red wine, tomato sauce), I'm happy with my choice of sticking to the Classic (white wine, herbs, garlic) and sharing with my date's Spartan (kalamata olive, garlic, tomato, oregano, olive oil). There are appetizers and other seafood options, but a heaping pot of mussels with homemade fries, that were admittingly disapointing. . . nothing special. . . and complimentary bread to soak up as much remaining liquid as you can stomach is a perfect meal. For dessert, which I don't normally do because I prefer a good savory and fulfilling meal, ending maybe with a port wine or sambuca, we ordered apple bread pudding that was laced with a whiskey caramel sauce sprinkled with cinammony, crunchy granola and served with an egg-shaped scoop of icecream. While I read recommendations about the doughnuts and strawberry shortcake, this dessert was great and perfect with the pressed tea accompaniment. To me, this place seemed like a hidden gem, one of the pricier ones, but perhaps only because I don't frequent that neighborhood hardly ever. It was far too busy and bustling for it to be a secret spot. On our way out, the smells of curry floated past. . .Maybe next time I would be more adventurous with the flavors, but I don't think these mussels need to be smothered in so much extra. I prefer complex simplicity.

Mussels with White Wine, Garlic and Herbs

1 pounds mussels

1/2 cup dry white wine

1 clove garlic, minced

1/2 shallot, sliced

1 bay leaf

1 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley leaves

Scrub the mussels under cold running water and discard any with open or broken shells. Remove the "beard" by pulling off any wiry threads from the seams.
In a large pot, bring the white wine, garlic, shallot and bay leaf to a boil.

Add the mussels, cover and cook for 2 minutes. Remove the cover, stir, recover and cook until the mussels open, about 2 to 3 minutes. Discard any mussels that do not open after 6 minutes.
Ladle the mussels into large bowls. Add the parsley to the broth and pour it over the mussels. Serve immediately.

"A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous." - Coco Chanel

Wine and Roses. . .Doesn't get much more romantic than that (well, maybe it could). But, this was such a perfect place for a girls night out. It's a small, dark, candle lit restaurant where the bar is central and takes up most of the space that breaths romance with the fresh flower petals scattered across the table and bar tops. There's a warmth about the whole place from the food to the wine that oozes out to the sidewalk even on a cold winter night. While it's not in my neighborhood, it was worth venturing out to the quiet, more mature, upper west side one evening to reunite with a couple of great girls in my life. They have an excellent wine selection, although pricey, and savory food choices that are more moderately priced for an UWS-NY spot. However, it's definitely not worth going for a $4 espresso!

There's nothing quite like a girls-night-out. .. and even better with the girls being single. Yes, that's because I'm single and want others to be open to have as much fun as me ;) Also, then we can bash boys and share stories of the difficulty of dating in the city or, on the positive side, of crushes we have or great one night stands. I mean, what else do you think girls do together? Really though, true friends that will stay around for life are hard to come by and worth the effort of maintaining even as times get busy. Girlfriends offer a unique relationship of support, nurturing and loyalty unlike that of what a guy could offer. Men are wonderful (some of them .. . sometimes) but they are a different species from Mars and women are from Venus. . .simple as that. There is not a man in the world that could take the place of a girlfriend.

Another place worth frequenting for a girls-night-out is Employees Only in the West Village. The cocktails are some of the best, along the lines of Little Branch, Hotel Griffou, Raines Law (just to name a few). The ginger smash uses fresh ginger root muddled with sweet cranberries, gin, apple liqueur and squeezed lemon juice and makes you feel semi-healthy and rationalize that the ginger is helping settle your stomach and easing your cold symptoms. Another popular drink amongst my girlfriends is the Amelia, potato vodka and St. Germain elderlower liqueur shaken with pureed blackberries and fresh lemon juice. Although this is too sweet for me to drink a full glass of it, let alone 3 as some of my friends, I enjoy a mini champagne flute of it compliments of the bartenders who are as unique as the place itself. It's best to get there early to get a seat at the bar to build a relationship with the bartenders before the crowd arrives. When my sister and I went on Christmas Eve, we enjoyed a low key dinner and glass of wine in the company of the men behind the bar. Dev generously complimented us with mini flutes of their Fraise Sauvage - gin shaken with wild strawberries and tahitian vanilla, topped with prosecco. It was the perfect ending to the delicious light meal of seared diver scallops and arugula and shaved fennel salad. The salad was mixed with a tangy lemon vinaigrette that was the perfect balance with the bold anise flavor from the fennel and sharpness of the shaved parmesan. The menu described the scallops accompainment as roasted cauliflower puree and tobiko, but what I received had a surprisingly different light curried flavor with a small slice of roasted cauliflower. But, I couldn't get enough, soaking up whatever puree or sauce was left in the bowl with the leftover table bread. Yum!

At Wine and Roses, my friend got a quiche that looked so comforting and hearty, perfect with a deep red wine that it inspired me to find some good recipes. Below is one for a feta veggie quiche that can easily be adapted to taste:

Ingredients
1 (9 inch) wheat pie crust
1 whole egg

4 egg whites
1 1/2 cups milk
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1/2 cup chopped onion
1/2 cup sliced fresh mushrooms
1/2 cup chopped fresh spinach
1/2 cup broccoli florets, chopped or roasted red peppers
1/4 cup crumbled Greek feta
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
Directions
Preheat an oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C). Line pie pan with pie crust, and place a double layer of aluminum foil over the crust. Bake in the preheated oven for 5 minutes, and then remove foil. Continue baking until crust begins to set, about 5 to 7 minutes; remove from oven. Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
In a mixing bowl, beat eggs with milk and flour. Stir in onion, mushrooms, spinach, broccoli, and feta cheese. Season with salt and pepper. Pour mixture into hot crust.
Bake quiche at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 45 minutes to one hour or when knife inserted in center comes out clean.

"The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off." - Gloria Steinem

Woman must not accept; she must challenge.

She must not be awed by that which has been built up around her;

she must reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression.

~ Margaret Sanger ~

When you walk in to Sheila Kelly's SFactor studio, there's something comforting about being surrounded by 6 inch platform shoes and dimly lit rooms with poles. I know it may sound strange, but when you leave after one class, there's an extra bounce in your step and an air of confidence radiating from you. . . feeling empowered for that moment. It was my experience at SFactor that inspired me to write the previous entry on empowerment. Women are still insecure with their bodies and owning their sexuality and sensuality. Why is it okay for men to have multiple girlfriends or wives, but women are considered sluts and may even be stoned or run over with a car for having a sexual relation? Society has molded women into submissive, sexually-restraint individuals. Why is it that women are always supposed to be in the mood to have sex whenever the man wants or at least compromise and suck it up. . .just because he's ready to go? We wait for the man to make the first move, to ask for our number, invite us on a date, and so on. I consider myself traditional in courtship and chivalry, but women need to begin to learn to own their voice and body and discover the power in them. Feeling your sensuality, acknowledging your sexuality, embracing your body. . .this is empowerment!

"A woman is the full circle. Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform." ~ Diane Mariechild

About a year ago, I signed up for an intro class at SFactor. I was intrigued to learn more about the pole dancing workout that incorporates dancing, strengthening and fun tricks on the pole that you see at the "classy" strip clubs. I left feeling energized, sexy and empowered. I walked out of the studio with a renewed energy and confidence but wasn't ready to financially make the commitment. It is definitely way overpriced, but a year later, I was ready to reap the potential benefits, making the economical sacrafrice and am absolutely loving it. For two hours a week, I am in my own world, away from judgements, stress, superficiality and any other frustrations or negativity. In class, it's my time for meditation and to be with and in my body, exploring myself with carelessness, embracing all that I am. The goal is to carry this feeling within at all times. The pole itself is seriously addicting and feels amazing to wind around, letting the body move freely as it feels to music before swinging in to a firefly. As in life, this experience at SFactor is about the journey, a personal journey in discovering, understanding and accepting me.

I'd like to meet one woman out there who has not fantasized about pole dancing, stripping, giving a lap dance. As dirty and uncomfortable as the fantasy may seem to you, it's hard to imagine, you've never fantasized for one, even brief, moment. And, if not, go on YouTube to find a pole dancing video and tell me it's not beautiful the way the body moves and that you don't get a tad bit envious of the woman's ability to let herself go and be sexy. Still no? Well, then you definitely need to take SFactor's workout class. Women's sexuality has been repressed for too long. It's time to connect with our bodies to feel empowered from the inside out.

Sexy, Sweet, and Indulgent Dark Chocolate Truffles:

Ingredients
8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped into 1/4-inch pieces
4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, chopped into 1/4-inch pieces
2/3 cup heavy cream

2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa, sifted
2 tablespoons confectioners' sugar, sifted

Place 8 ounces semisweet chocolate and the unsweetened chocolate in a 4-quart bowl.
Heat the heavy cream in a 1 1/2-quart saucepan over medium heat. Bring to a boil. Pour the boiling cream over the chocolate. Allow to stand for 5 minutes, then stir until smooth (now you have ganache). Refrigerate the ganache for 1 hour until firm but not hard.
Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. Using a tablespoon of ganache for each truffle (approximately 3/4 ounce), portion 24 truffles, evenly space onto the parchment lined baking sheet. Refrigerate the ganache portions for 15 minutes (so the ganache will be firm enough to roll into truffles). When the ganache is firm enough to handle, remove from the refrigerator and individually roll each portion of ganache in your palms, in a gentle circular motion, using just enough pressure to form smooth rounds. Roll 16 of the rounds in 2 tablespoons cocoa and separately roll 8 in the confectioners sugar until completely covered. Store the truffles in a tightly sealed plastic container, in the refrigerator. Remove about 1 hour before serving.

"Give light, and the darkness will disappear of itself." - Desiderius Erasmus

EMPOWERMENT: to give official authority or legal power to; enable; to promote the self-actualization or influence of

Empowerment has played an important role throughout history and has become ever more president today, crucial in the trendy age self-help and social responsibility. Shortly after having arisin in the mid-17th century with the legalistic meaning, the word empowerment began to be used in a more general and infinite way of enabling or permitting. Its more modern use originated in the civil rights movement and was later taken up by the women's movement. Born out of such historical and political movements, advancements and changes, there is no doubt of the importance and strength of empowerment of a peoples.
I previously explored inspiration and the impact it can have on someone, but the gift of empowerment may be even more profound. According to Wikipedia, "empowerment refers to increasing the spiritual, political, social or economic strength of individuals and communities." By developing confidence in one's own capacities, the individual can then feel conscious and in control. Empowerment is such a strong and useful tool for personal and societal advancement but so difficult to develop and grab hold of in a world full of human rights atrocities, gender inequality, illness, racism, violence and poverty.
While the definition and process of empowerment can encompass a lot, for the purpose of this entry, I want to focus on personal development and empowerment that is often associated with feminism and the women's movement. Millions of women throughout the world live in conditions of severe deprivation of, and attacks against, their fundamental human rights for no other reason than that they are women. We hear of acid attacks of women in Pakistan, stonings of women in Iran, tens of thousands of Indian women and girls dying during pregnancy, in childbirth, and in the weeks after giving birth, adolescent girls victims of human trafficking, etc. The headlines of women and girls being victims of human rights abuses goes on and on.
America's culture has come a long way since the first wave of the feminist movement in the 18th century, but there are still signs of opression and stereotypes that keep women feeling marginalized and insecure. Generation after generation, it is tiring to feel repressed, and now is the time to reclaim control and no longer accept and internalize society's pressures.
Empowerment has personal meaning and the process different for different people at different times. For many women, it has to do with feeling in control and confident in our bodies and lives. It's a struggle to feel independent, financially and emotionally, to not depend on anyone else to support or make you happy. This all comes from within and radiates outward to then be able to have a healthy relationship with others, one with out dependency. As for empowering ourselves through our bodies, these struggles can be compared across cultures. Women have been sexually exploited and victims of violence since beginning of time. In America, we place extremely high values and importance on the superficial and have created a culture of eating disorders and plastic surgery. While body image issues are always a result of deeper issues and complexes, and it's important to begin to understand those in order to get to the root of the problem that has manifested itself in to an eating disorder, for example, it's also important to understand the culture that has contributed to the rise in numbers of women and girls with this illness. However, my philosophy on this is not to place such an emphasis on media analysis. While I believe the images fed to women through the media do present unhealthy stereotypes and ideals, it is more cultural values that emphasize submission rather than communication/expression and this is taught to us by those closest, family, friends, teachers, etc. Besides understanding the roots of these issues, women and girls can still work to have a healthy relationship with their bodies, to empower themselves and reclaim their femininity as personally desired. Empowerment is about choice and freedom. . .having the power to decide for yourself, nobody mandating or placing you in a box. Women and girls must begin to explore themselves and see what provides best satisfaction and nourishment for their own soul. We must break the silence and no longer be restrained to holding in emotions and sexuality for fear that others will not approve or be judgmental since it goes against the norms of what we were taught and had ingrained in us since childhood. If the norms were always accepted, there would never have been progress in politics or human rights. Norms can and should be challenged and reinvented, beginning on a small scale, beginning with confidence in yourself.
Economic empowerment is equally challenging and important these days for women. Looking at even one generation past to my mother, I see how much times have changed. We've learned to struggle for independence and that education is foremost important, leading then to a career. In countries outside of the United States, women are still not allowed to vote or go to school or have their own businesses. We are fortunate in the States to have made this stride. However, it was only just a little less than 100 years ago that women gained voting rights in the U.S. Around the world, in underdeveloped and developing countries, women are still treated like second-class citizens or worse like slaves, held down by men, politics and religion.
I recently attended a talk by Nobel Peace Prize Winner, Muhammad Yunnis and editor of The Economist and was awakened to the the incredible world of microfinance. Muhammad Yunnis founded the Grameen Bank in Bangladesh in 1983 under the belief that credit is a fundamental human right. From his concept was born another great version of person-to-person microlending websites like Kiva and Vittana. With just $25, you can finance a personso that he or she can start a business in order to sustain themselves and family or you can fund loans for people looking to get a college education in developing countries. This is empowering individuals to create change and help poor people escape from poverty. Furthermore, for women especially, this can be life-changing as they become self-sufficient, contribute to the family's income (or in many cases become the bread-winner), which then raises their social status at home and in the larger community, giving them a voice. Also, it's a win-win-situation since the lender is making an investment and can acquire interest that he or she will gain once the other person begins to profit from their business or gets a job from going to school. This form of empowerment could be one of the greatest gifts one could give this holiday season.